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As the saying goes,
Святое дерьмо! это комикс го-го!

Back in the 1960s, Angie Bowie (then wife of David Bowie) approached Stan Lee to see if she could get the rights for one year to develop and air a Black Widow and Daredevil TV show. Ultimately, the program was never produced because it was too expensive and the special effects would have been to difficult to create.

Angela Bowie (b. 1950) was married to David for 10 years. She met him through a man that both were dating. Yes, you read that right. Then, somehow in their drug-addled and tempestuous union, they managed to produce a son. The son survived and went on to direct Moon, one of our favorite recent movies, and Source Code which was fun enough. Next up for the boy (Duncan Jones)? An Ian Fleming biopic project. Worthy topic, good sir.

Und zo, what we’ve learned is that great art can come from heroin and cocaine. Since our art is pathetic (actually it doesn’t exist, but let’s not mince words), we are going to take up both those drugs as well as throw in a dash of meth to put a modern spin on the whole affair. We’ll let you know how it turns out. Assuming we live long enough to do so.

Zounds! It’s another Comics A-Go-Go! infographic! Here we explore the effects of drug use with Angela and David Bowie doing the honors. Just take it from ol’ Nancy Reagan .. “Dope ain’t dope, yo-yo!”

After David Bowie went sober, realized who he was living with, divorced her and left to make a bunch of boring music and the single most unnecessary song and video in all of pop music-dom (a song which proved to be a perfect match for the sad pairing of David and Mick Jagger … during which time the not-so hush-hush gossip in the press led to folks in the know dubbing Bowie and Jagger “The Ambiguously Gay Duo” — a designation that inspired the Dana Carvey Show/Saturday Night Live vignettes of the same name — and there’s the animation/comic book tie-in you were waiting for), [... where we we? oh yeah ...] Angie got all bitter and stuff.

News of Angela Bowie as Black Widow and Ben Carruthers as Daredevil for the  TV show concept.

Anyway. You know how we feel about miscasts. Angie was a heroin waif and look liked she could pull off all of the physical stuff needed to play Natasha Romanova, Russian cum-S.H.I.E.L.D spy/action figure extraordinaire as well (a.k.a. as poorly) as Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman could. That was a hell of a sentence. Keeping it simple: Angie Bowie wouldn’t be a good Black Widow. Having said that, with her wig and ever-so-cheery imitation-Russian facial expressions, she fit the era, we suppose. Paul Gulacy may have based his 1980s version of Black Widow on Angie’s screen tests (see pictures below). The decidedly non-Daredevil-esque looking dude in the promo shots is Ben Carruthers whom you may remember from such movies as Shadows (1959) and The Dirty Dozen (1967). What an awful costume. Hornhead indeed. Reminds us of a cartoonish-looking alien with antennas. As for the sullen expression, we have to wonder if EVERYONE was on some sort of narcotic in the 1970s.  That would explain the fashion, entertainment, and even the politics of the era. We’re grateful to have grown up in the Ecstasy era instead.

In theory, the show was supposed to springboard off the chemistry of the Daredevil/Black Widow team-up and romance that had started just a couple of years earlier in the comics. We have to admit that we are actually curious to know what the whole disaster would have looked like. But we would probably regret that curiousity. So, we’ll settle for Scarlett Johansson.

Here’s a Black Widow story from the early 1980s. Paul Gulacy did the art and Ralph Macchio wrote the story. Humphrey Bogart guest stars. Click on the links at the bottom of each page at the Gulacy website to read the whole story. Don’t stray too far, though. We want you back.

Here are some additional Black Widow illustrations from Paul Gulacy’s portfolio.

Other than a penchant for strange hair styles, Duncan Jones has turned out rather normal in spite of his parent’s own penchant for hard drugs and nefarious sexual escapades.

Where did we leave off?

Tags: Angela Bowie, Angie Bowie, Black Widow, David Bowie, Drugs, Duncan Jones, Marvel Comics, Sexy