5 Sexy Women in Marvel Masterpieces Series III Card Set

Greg and Tim Hildebrandt Marvel Masterpieces III Trading CardsBack in the 1990s when non-sport cards were all the rage, I got several cards signed by Greg and Tim Hildebrandt during one of the Comic-Cons. The cards were brilliantly done. The whole set of 140 base cards was made up of paintings showcasing Marvel characters and were artfully crafted by the Brothers Hildebrandt, a twin team of painters specializing in fantasy artwork, particularly Tolkien’s works.

The artwork in this series was far superior format by comparison to the Marvel Masterpieces Series II set which I think suffered from inconsistencies due to too many different styles of artwork from various artists. Series III hearkened back to the much more positively received Marvel Masterpieces I which similarly was painted entirely by Joe Jusko.

Since sexy comic book characters have proven to be particularly popular on my blog, I pulled out five of the best looking characters that were signed by the brothers. Here they are:

Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Black Cat) Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Domino) Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Elektra) Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Silver Sable) Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Typhoid Mary)And here’s your bonus. I pulled out a couple of characters I’m particularly partial to, Nick Fury and Daredevil. Here are their cards, also signed by Greg and Tim Hildebrandt.

Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Nick Fury) Marvel Masterpieces III, Hildebrandt Brothers (Daredevil)

Some favorite things

Just thinking about stuff tonight. Stuff we like. Stuff that one might consider “favorites.” Ready or not, it’s sharing time again.

A Bug's Life

Favorite insect: Toss-up. Lady bug or Praying Mantis. Why? They eat other bugs. Since there’s a tie, however, we’re going to let dragonflies surge ahead. Why? Because they consume large quantities of mosquitoes. We aren’t partial to killing insects for the sake of doing it. No, it just doesn’t feel right to kill a fly as it passes by. But mosquitoes? They are the only animals we will actually go out of our way to kill. If a bug tries to take our blood, that’s personal. There’s a skeeter flying around the room right now. We can hear it. Little whining sound. As soon as we catch sight of it, this post will be put on hold until our bloodletting is satiated. That’s right, you little bastardette, we’re coming for you. We should feel a bit misogynistic because we only want to kill the females … but it’s only the females that attack people, so  no apologies from us.

Dragonfly in AC Comics

Go git ‘er, girl! Destroy the Succubus!

SpidersFavorite arachnid: Jumping Spiders. Why? They’re just so darn cute what with all their bouncing around and stuff. Plus they have really cool eyes (and apparently incredible eyesight … which would make sense, we suppose).


Spyder! Spyder! burning bright
In the forests of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?
(from a bastardized version by J.M. DeMatteis of William Blake’s poem)

Favorite ape: Bonobos. Why? Because they settle all disputes and manage stress with sex. And you thought we were going to say humans. Nope. Human sex actually leads to wars.

Bonobo ape

Git yer wimen ‘n’ chir’en inside! Them bonobos is loose agin!

Chimpanzee. More human than a human.


Leave the real fighting to us humans, you damn dirty apes!

Dr. Seuss

Hmm. Apparently we prefer violent animals, so it appears, apparently.

Favorite beetle: Tweetle beetle (and we’re not talking about a favorite Beatle, fyi. If we were, we’d have to say Pete Best. Or Dick Starkey).

Take a minute to read the snipped tongue twister from our favorite Dr. Seuss book, Fox in Socks. Come back when you’re done. There are still plenty of good times to be had here, too.

Richard Starkey (Ringo Starr), Pete Best

Mae West and W.C. Fields

We’re guessing that referring to Mae West as a “little chickadee” is a satiric play on words. We suspect that one could get a much larger breast of white meat off Mae (hey, this reminds us of our Biggest Boobs in Comics post) than off an actual chickadee. Hmm. How many chickadees would it take to make a chickadee smamich, do you suppose?

As for the swallow, as far as we know, it’s the only animal that can make a precise 90 degree turn at 40 miles per hour. Scientists are still working on it, but it appears that swallows can warp time and space. Tip of the hat to you, remarkable bird.

Favorite bird: Chickadees with swallows flying a close second. Why? Because chickadees are like the squirrels of the bird world. They’re quick and jittery and mischievous and generally silly. Swallows are incredibly aerodynamic natural machines and just mesmerizing to watch.


Look at that little fella. Ain’t he a cute’un? Our cat thinks so too. Fly away, chickadee!

Swallow (bird)

Swallows are built like a stealth fighter and can slice through air like a ginsu knife through paper. Hmm. Perhaps we have a new clandestine weapon. Are swallows native to Syria?

Pickles (food)Favorite pickle: None. We’ve all agreed that pickles have no place in the food pyramid. And the spawn of Satan’s garden from which pickles originate (cucumbers for the less than savvy) makes pickles even more detestable. We do like the word “pickle” though. It’s a funny word. And we really like it in the sentence, “Boys, we’re in a bit of a pickle.” Whenever possible, we slip that phrase into the course of a conversation. We’d like to say that there is no time where uttering that sentence would be inappropriate, but it seems that this is not the case, if friends are to be believed. We’ll let you decide for your own purposes, oh dear readers.

Favorite soft serve ice cream: Wendy’s Original Chocolate Frosty™. Duh.

Eva Longoria

If Wendy’s Original Chocolate Frosty™ is good enough for Eva Longoria, then it should be good enough for anyone. We don’t need a celebrity endorsement, though. Our addiction runs deep.

Favorite time of the day: yes, the one on the left.

Favorite hero comic book: We’d have to go with Daredevil. Why? He’s like Spider-man but with grit. He’s got a pretty cool costume, skills, and hot girlfriends. We’ve read Daredevil more than any other mainstream hero book and are one book shy of completing a full run of volume 1. Not sure if that’s a boast or an observation on how much money we have sunk into our hobby. Suffice it to say that Daredevil is the only comic book title that we have pursued so vigorously. We’re too damn cheap to start anything else.

Daredevil Marvel Comics

Daredevil’s career has spanned over 500 issues and almost 40 years. You’ve come a long way, baby.

Favorite non-hero comic book or graphic novel: We should put an end to this “favorites” thing. Since we’re violently oppossed to commitment, how are we supposed to decide which graphic novel or comic is our favorite? There are just too many good ones. Besides, we are now bored and tired.

Ok, we just need to put in one last “favorite” …

Favorite past-time: Sleeping. Which is what we’re going to do now. Good night. We’ll be dreaming of you.

Little Nemo in Slumberland

Oy vey, A-OK!

We started on a post tonight about Hellboy and got tired writing it so for now you get this sucky, nothing of a post. Just to make the search engines perk up (or because they are smarter than we are, perhaps not), here are a bunch of interesting things to index:

Shocking News! Roseanne Barr has been cast as the Kingpin in the reboot of Daredevil. Talk about a miscast. She would have made a better Foggy. The new film is to be released in 2013 and this time stars Matt Damon as The Man Without Fear. Talk about your proverbial bitch slap, Ben. You heard it here first.

Update! Comics are still GO! … in spite of the fact that readership has dwindled 67% in the last 20 years and a whopping 82% year-over-year in the last three years. Hello recession! Goodbye fan boys! By the way, we didn’t bother checking our math, so we don’t really know if those statistics would work. Who cares. The junk in this post is all made up anyway. For all we know, maybe comic book readership is on the rise. Doubtful, but maybe.

French Poodles! … are not to be trusted. They are angry animals. With good reason. No self-respecting animal would desire a “body ‘fro,” and it stands to reason that the poodles would want to take revenge on the race that bred mutations in them to such ridiculously obscene degrees.

Sex is over-rated! Huh. Who knew?

General John J. Pershing was born in Missouri not Wisconsin! Not much to add here.

North Koreans are sad! It’s because they are beholden to an insane little powder puff. How the hell is it that in today’s world an entire nation can be held hostage by a tyrant and a few cronies? Will there be an Asian Spring too? We hope, we hope. The dynamics of political and economic sociology are astounding. Perhaps we should invade. And by “we,” we mean everybody that is not American. We Americans have done enough damage, thank you. It’s your turn, the-rest-of-the-world-except-China-because-China-is-afraid-of-offending-Nutcase-Kim. Talk about being held hostage. Hello, China?Really? The fastest growing economy and soon-to-be the ruler of the Earth is run by a few old wrinkly men that have managed to oppress 1.2 billion people. Wow. But of course to be fair, we here at home are oppressed in other ways – some human, but most commercial (isn’t that right Occupy Wall Street movement people?) . Ah well. 2012 is around the corner and it all ends then, right?

Breaking News! October 21, 2011 is the revised “Judgment Day” according to Rev. Harold Camping. Beware. Run for shelter! Prepare to die all you non-Christians, because as we all know, God hates a non-Christian … unless you are a non-Christian. Then God hates Christians. Huh. Maybe we all die!

****UPDATED NEWS AS OF OCTOBER 22, 2011!****

Well, looks like Harold Camping is still a nutjob or just a mean-spirited old man. The world didn’t end yesterday as far as we know. It’s a shame too. We all had on our tinfoil hats and red spandex jumpsuits just chomping at the bit for the Rhapsody. Or Nirvana. Or Hell.  We didn’t know what to expect, but we were ready nontheless. Now Barney’s going to have to go back to his co-worker Marian and apologize for calling her several rude names on his way out of the company. Louise will have to stop eating boxes of eclairs as she did in the week leading up to the impending “event,” and Old Sweater Guy will be doing nothing different, as usual.

Predictability in the Marvel Kingdom of Comics

In a recent survey of 1400 respondents, the pollsters at Comic Book Resources reported that the the votes for the Top 3 Marvel comic book characters of all time are … #1 – Spider-man (of course, any doubts really?) … and then it all goes to hell. Who’s #2? – Captain America. Really? (OK, we suppose if you look across the entire spectrum the Super Soldier’s comic career, the Cap has some legs; not many characters in the House of Ideas can boast about 70 years of longevity). … And then – the big “whaaa?!” moment: #3 is … wait for it … Thor. Yes, the Norse God of Thunder. The handsome Aryan diety-dude with the long hair and big hammer and feathers on his helmet. Not that we don’t think Thor has some merit if compared to, say, The Purple Man or Dazzler (sorry Dazzler, it’s not fair to be grouped with Purple Man but you are kind of useless; pretty but useless). But, c’mon.

Top 3 Vote GettersUnfortunately, there is a predictability factor that makes these types of polls irrelevant. Take us back two years and we will lay odds that Thor doesn’t even crack the Top 10. Why? Because Thor owns a very small slice of the Marvel Story and his own backstory resonates more with the DC Universe than it does with the mere mortal riddled costumed heroes and villians of the Marvel Universe. Thor’s an odd character to begin with. Spidey’s abilities are unusual and he may take on some weird baddies, but outside of the webslinger role, he’s a regular guy with regular problems. We can all relate to a degree to his personal joys and foibles. His allies and enemies are mostly from our realm. Most of the best Marvel heroes are like Spider-man … humans. Humans with special abilities but human enough.

Thor? He comes from a place most people don’t even read about in literature. It’s one thing to link into Greek or Roman mythology but who knows anything about Asgard and Odin except old Sven Skarsgard and he’s not really the best guy to ask since he piddles his adult incontinence products (read: big diapers) and yells indiscriminately at squirrels and birds during his mid-day outdoor time.

Thor by Simonson

Don't ask.

So why Thor now? Because of a movie. Because people live in the moment and cultish fans tend to skew rational analysis. That explains why a movie like Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace started with around 8.0 IMDB rating before finally settling into the mid 6’s. So, because Thor gets a movie (we suppose he was next on the list since most of the big ones have been done – but where’s the love for Moon Knight or Dr. Strange, by the way? Just kidding – “Hellstorm: Son of Satan” should be next. Just kidding about that too. Silver Sable and Spiderwoman teaming up would be the cat’s meow (especially if it included the Black Cat) [where were we? …] is a moderate success at the theater, it’s on people’s minds and it doesn’t take much imagination to get to … “Yeah, Thor. I would say Thor. ‘Cuz Thor is so … awesome. And I like Nordic-looking men with big muscles that talk funny. Did I mention the muscles?” One could argue, and we will, that the same phenomenon is what put Captain America at number two. Although, there is no question the Big Red White and Blue deserves to much higher than Thor.

Captain America in the 1940's

Captain America is over 70 years old!

Having said that – what the hell is “Top 3” anyway? Depends on how you define it, but for us, “top” mean the characters that would leave the biggest holes in the Marvel Universe if they ceased to exist.

So, what’s our top 3? Like we said, Spider-man is #1. You don’t even need to like him, but he’s untouchable. He’s just simply the essence of Marvel Comics and is an icon of what made comic characters become so accessible during the Silver Age. Moving on to #2 … X-Men (that’s not cheating; the X-Men are a team first and individual characters after). Their absence would destroy a very large chunk of the Marvel Story. Yes, there are many of them but that’s the point. Collectively, the theme of human mutants is singular and very deeply entangled into what Marvel wants to tell us.

Wolverine X-MenAnd lastly, #3 … Wolverine. Now bear with us. The reason Wolverine above other pillars of the Universe is because he has never lost momentum since being introduced in the late 1970’s. The Hulk has seen his ups and downs and it’s hard to get past “Hulk Smash” no matter how many story forms he comes in; Iron Man just never climbed up to the top (although he had great potential really, so we’re not quite sure what happened); other X-Men haven’t had as much success, and teams like the Fantastic Four and Avengers have had big dry spells. But Wolverine appeals. He slides very easily into other heroes stories and does so with amazing frequency. He has a complicated past which creates a wealth of opportunities to write a bunch of sideline stories. Wolverine will never be close to #1 but he deserves his position.

Marvel Comics DaredevilIf we were voting from our own bias, however, Daredevil would be right up there. Daredevil is like a gritty, more adult version of Spiderman. His backstory is relevant, especially with Frank Miller’s tinkering, and the cast of cohorts and villains is rich and diverse. The Man Without Fear is a troubled man and his drama creates interest outside the costume. Thor? Again, not so accessible. So while Daredevil won’t take the third spot, he’s still ahead of The Hulk, Iron Man, and Captain America in our books.

And there you go.